The Heroic High Schooler, the Farting Copper, the Hating of the Kittens, the Stalking of the Onision, and the Slapping of the Mom

the "follow your dreams" sloth gif (via poophitsthefan.tumblr)

We will begin today's thrilling mega blog post with some gallant stories of heroic citizens standing up against injustice and corruption... stories which will hopefully inspire us all to do the same, and maybe just maybe..give us the gumption to get out there and follow our own dreams as well.

Up first, we bring you the inspirational story of high school student Jeff Bliss...who's extraordinary speech regarding education and the future of our country, has all of America rightly buzzing.

"James Franco sleeping in class" meme

I know many of our role models have not exactly made learning seem exciting for our young people, and that is part of the problem that Jeff touches on.  Alright, well enough of my pointless chuntering.  You can listen to an excerpt of Jeff Bliss's amazing performance below in the first ever episode of "Greatest American Heroes of American History" hosted by Abraham Fungus Jr.


Greatest American Heroes of American History: Volume 1 (with Jeff)




Yes,  I'm sure Jeff even had Grumpy Cat furiously applauding by the time he was done.

Grumpy Cat starring in "Citizen Kane" clapping gif (created by an unknown genius)

"chillin' like a villain" cat meme

Not to be out done, 12 year old Jeremy Drew confronted a cop "breaking the law" (allegedly) for parking his motorized vehicle on the sidewalk while he was busy getting himself a tasty soft drink.  (SEE:  Cop breaking the law)  The video of this act of courage by Jeremy has gone viral.  But that didn't prevent me from pitching in to help spread the word of Jeremy's heroism by making a video for my very own youtube channel currently entitled...


Cop Breaking the Law and Farting on Annoying Kid






Welp, I've given you all a glimpse of heaven with those 2 very uplifting stories...now it is time for me to drag you back down to Hell...

"SHIT JUST GOT REAL" cat meme

It seems that Abraham Fungus Jr.'s imaginary feud at youtube with TheAmazingAtheist heated up once again, as the former official Independent presidential candidate of JimmyFungus.com made yet another AA response video.  (SEE:  Murdering Christian Rocker??  (AMAZING ATHEIST GIVE ME A BREAK!!)

I also personally took issue with some of TheAmazingAtheist's more inflammatory statements in his most recent video, so I took the liberty to make the following response video below entitled...


THE AMAZING ATHEIST HATES KITTENS






Now, that I have told you about an imaginary youtube feud, let me tell you about one that is sadly VERY real, and VERY SERIOUS BUSINESS.


The Stalking of Greg Onision

the stalking of Greg Onision

I know many of my readers are very busy people, so you might not know of this current drama that is engulfing youtube.  So let me bring you up to date with the most ridiculous...err, I mean most interesting parts of the most relevant videos I could find.  Then I will follow that up with an in-depth report, by our very own roving entertainment reporter, Lord Throckmorton Fungusleaves.


Greg tells the stalker to cool it...



And this is "exactly who (Greg) is talking about":  MrRepzion.  Welp, this video footage will give you a small idea of what Onision has had to put up with lately...



And as promised, here is a full in-depth report on the whole controversy, brought to you by the distinguished Lord Throckmorton Fungusleaves III...




Now last, and probably least as well, is my new video about something old...

kid slapping mom on Dr. Phil gif (cameo from Monsters Inc. monster)

Anywho, I think i've posted enough videos.  It's getting kind of ridiculous.  So, I will simply post a link to this last one entitled  Kid SLAPS mom on Dr. Phil (in super slow motion).
Uh-huh, there you have it.  Another exciting day in the blogosphere.  I have brought you up to date on everything but Wilford Brimley (but I did that last week, so stop complaining).

Once again, thank you all, and please remember to support your local zoo.

Stay classy, Chicago!