CHRISTMAS SUCKS: When you come out of the bathroom, and Hitler has stolen your seat (via the internets)
Merry Christmas, kids. Well, as you know, true believers...today is Christmas, so I thought it would be a good time for another one of my Adolph Hitler posts...
Anywho, it was my original intention for Lord Throckmorton Fungusleaves and myself to produce another episode of my series "UNTRUE HITLER STORIES" for my youtube channel (which by the way has been a completely dismal failure of a youtube series so far). But the Lord of Fungus was way too busy with Christmas preparations...
Luckily, since the presidential election season is over, former Independent presidential candidate Abraham Fungus Jr. hasn't had a lot to do. So, he has been making some cool videos for me of late. They are not necessarily directly related to Christmas, but they are religious in nature (which probably has a lot more to do with Christmas than 90% of the Christmas mumbo jumbo you see reported by the mainstream anti-Rebecca Black media!).
So, the first Abraham Fungus Jr. video that I am posting for you was a response to the Amazing Atheist of youtube, and the Amazing Atheist's very timely Christmas video "Jesus is a Scumbag."
The Amazing Atheist: As seen on Youtube (via Party9999999 on deviantART)
So here is the Amazing Atheist's video "Jesus is a Scumbag!"...
...and here is Abraham Fungus Jr.'s response to the Amazing Atheist.
Being that Abraham Fungus Jr. is not only my top news & politics analyst, but also my End Times biblical prophecy expert, I asked him if he would mind doing me a vid on the "end of the world" issue as well.
Nostradamus predicts the end of the world "Gangnam Style" meme (via the internets)
Then I came across a video by William Tapley (aka "the third eagle of the Apocalypse" and "co-prophet of the End Times") who hosts a show called "Revelation Unraveled." When I viewed Mr. Tapley's video "The Antichrist Arrives Gangnam Style", I felt it was important that Abraham Fungus Jr. produce a response video as soon as possible, or before the Second Coming of Christ (whichever came first).
So here is William Tapley's video "The Antichrist Arrives Gangnam Style!"...
...and here is my Biblical prophecy expert Abraham Fungus Jr.'s response to "The Antichrist Arrives Gangnam Style!"
Welp, dear friends. That is all the amazing new Christmas content I have available for you today. Once again, Merry Christmas, and please remember to support your local zoo.
The new Batman movie "The Dark Knight Rises" directed by Christopher Nolan is not even out in theaters yet...but that has not stopped people from having very strong opinions about it. SEE: Rotten Tomatoes Suspends Comments on Dark Knight The well known movie review site rottentomatoes.com had to shut down user comments because so many anonymous internet thugs were making heinous, life-threatening comments against film critics who spoke poorly of the upcoming movie. Not that I don't have some sympathy for these "anonymous internet thugs." I have had a beef with film critics ever since Roger Ebert ruined the ending of "Dead Poets Society" for me when I was a kid (his justification was that the ending was predictable, so if you were too stupid to see it coming, it was your own damn problem).
But, the reason I bring this up friends, is yes, sadly... JimmyFungus.com recently was attacked by one of these anonymous internet tough guy bullies, and I nearly had to put in place some kind of comment moderation of my own (I hope I will never have to do this).
I may not be Batman, but using the sophisticated technologies available to me, combined with the fact that the perpetrator apparently has the IQ of a poorly fermented pickle, I was able to pinpoint exactly where the comments had come from in less than 2 minutes.
"BACKTRACED IT"
Despite this supposedly anonymous bully's obvious stupidity, he seems to fancy himself as an "intellectual." For the comments were written in a style of speech one would hear Helena Bonham Carter using on an episode of "Masterpiece Theater", only in this episode of "Masterpiece Theater" Helena Bonham Carter plays a prostitute in one of King Henry VIII's brothels (if that would even be historically accurate, cut me some slack on that), for his comments were laced with obscenities, expletives, and pornographic references. Worse yet, this bumbling buffoon then attempted to impersonate me, again using the anonymous function, and responding to his own idiotic comments, but then signing my name (I have read that talking to yourself makes you smarter, but clearly not in this guy's case). Ok, first of all, my readers are some of the savviest, and most intelligent people on the face of the earth. They know I wouldn't use the anonymous function to reply to comments on my own website. Secondly, they know I don't talk like a member of Fagin's gang from an off Broadway re-adaptation of the musical version of "Oliver Twist", as this drooling dumb ass wrote his comments to sound like.
"YOU'RE BANNED" (via lolz.ar)
So, Mr. Supposedly Anonymous Online Thug..., YOU ARE BANNED...BANNED!!...from JimmyFungus.com for life!!
Also, this knucklehead has been playing the same game on blogs all across the internets, and has probably been doing this for some time. I don't know if it is his lame attempt at trying to be funny, or a round about way of spamming some pornographic websites...but here good sir, allow me to assist you...
Uhh, yeah..so how does one carry on in a world where there are so many naysayers, just ready to fling their smelly, rotten turds at you, for no other reason than for their own stinkin' amusement? How does one live brightly, in a world of darkness? No one knows. No, there is actually someone who knows: Lord Picklejar, (the arch duke of Hell in the service of Satan).
Lord Picklejar: "HAIL SATAN!"
In this video lecture, which is in a series of lectures called "Great Lectures in Evil", Lord Picklejar responds to a contest held by the people who make Sun Chips, in which people send in stories about how they can "live brightly", and then perhaps win a nice prize, but at the same time, change the world for the better...
Watch Lord Picklejar's eyes at the beginning of this video. Wouldn't he be a great boyfriend for Overly Attached Girlfriend girl?? (I'm not sayin', I'm just sayin.)
Bush is Back
I screwed you all... but thanks for blaming it on the black guy. ~ George W. Bush meme
Well, we very seldom hear from former President Bush anymore, because he is trying to stay out of the limelight. In fact the only time we ever do hear from him is if he is feuding with Kanye West, or promoting a new book. So, guess what... George W. Bush has a new book out called "The 4 Percent Solution: Unleashing the Economic Growth America Needs", so he is doing interviews. SEE: George W. Bush: 'Eight Years Was Awesome, And I Was Famous And I Was Powerful'
"Eight years was awesome, and I was famous and I was powerful." George W. Bush in his interview with Peter Robinson
Wellllll, kids... I really try to avoid taking sides on a lot of these political things, because I like to remain an objective investigative journalist, so I will just post what HuffPost user TheKurgan said about it...which I think, pretty well sums it up!
"Getting George W. Bush to expound on the econmy is like asking Napoleon Dynamite to dscover the Higgs Boson," TheKurgan.
"We don't have books anymore. We have Spiderman," George W. Bush. (No, just kidding! He didn't really say that. I don't think.)
Song of the Day
As per usual, we play ourselves out with a song. It's "Goodbye", the last song on Elton John's legendary album "Madman Across the Water", but it's an unusual version of this song. Luckily it was posted by youtube user CrazyWater so we could all hear it...
I'm sorry, I took your time... I am the poem that doesn't rhyme... Once again, thank you all, and please remember to support your local zoo.
Hello again, true believers. In our last exciting post, we discussed political propaganda and the toll it takes on our democracy (or what's left of it). But are we as a people, finally getting hip to what is going on here? Have you ever surfed the internet and seen the slew of "So-and-So DESTROYS So-and-So" political videos. Video titles like "Senator Such-and-Such CRUSHES Ron Paul", "So-and-So eviscerates Robert Gibbs", "Glenn Beck annihilates (fill in the blank)", or vice versa. For example, one side will post a video "Moe DESTROYS Curly"...then the other side of the aisle will post THE EXACT SAME VIDEO and the title will be "Curly DESTROYS Moe." I mean honestly, do they think we're that stupid? We are gonna just sit there and say, "Oh ok. Senator Larry Fine destroyed Congressman Moe Howard in a debate. That takes care of that!"
So, I figured WHAT THE HECK... I could get in on this little trend and post my bogus headlines as well. So here it goes...
Bad Luck Brian DESTROYS Sean Hannity!!!!!
Bad Luck Brian CRUSHES Sean Hannity
Unfortunately, this tremendous victory did not change Bad Luck Brian's luck all that much...
Bad Luck Brian: "EXPELLED FROM COLLEGE FOR PLAGIARISM"
and now for something completely different...
"The Amazing Spiderman" trailer
I don't really have anything profound to say about this "The Amazing Spiderman" trailer. I pretty much brought it up, just so I would have a chance to re-post this...
"that really rustled my jimmies": "slightly rustled" Emma Stone edition
The Return of Dax Flame Continues
Dax Flame: "I think I got the measles, baby!"
SEE: My Improvisational Acting Moments - YouTube As you know, I have been very excited about the return of Dax Flame to youtube, and what this might mean for our future. This will be the first in a series of new Dax Flame memes...so stay tuned.
SONG OF THE DAY
Best Coast "When I'm With You" video
And as we so often do, today we play ourselves out with a song... Here is "When I'm With You" by Best Coast.
Once again, God bless you, and thank you for your support.
